I’m not much of a sports fan… with two exceptions: horseback riding and CrossFit. So, like I said – not that into sports. 😉

Anyway, I watched Rich Froning and Camille LeBlanc-Bazinet win the CrossFit Games in dominant fashion this year, and was blown away by the ease with which they both seemed to move through each event.

Afterward, they were both interviewed and one thing really stood out to me that they both talked about when asked how they prepared for this year’s stiff competition. They each said that they trained their weaknesses.

I’ll say that again: they trained their weaknesses.

Not their strengths. Not the things they like doing best. Not the things that are the most fun or the most flashy or the most badass.

Their weaknesses… the things that they felt demolished after working on. The things they hated or that hurt or that were boring. The things that they sucked at.

What does this mean to you? Well, when it comes to our relationships – really our lives in general – we all tend to train our strengths.

“I’m great at having fun, as long as we’re hanging out with this group of friends!”

“We get along great! Especially when the kids are doing well in school.”

“Our bank balance looks better than ever… thanks to that raise hubby just got!”

Let’s face it – it’s way easier to feel awesome when everything is going awesome. And that’s fine – until a weakness appears… and you haven’t trained it.

So, how do you go about strengthening your relationships? Well, first you have to identify your weakness. This is a tough one for a lot of us, so here’s a list of some common ones to break the ice:

  • You are hesitant to share your true thoughts and feelings with your partner
  • If you and your partner disagree, your first instinct is to convince them why they’re wrong and you’re right
  • You feel bored in your partnership
  • You try to control how your partner behaves (dresses, talks, etc.)
  • You don’t remember the last time you showed affection to your partner
  • You and your partner are always together – 24/7/365
  • You and your partner never see each other
  • You can’t agree on how to spend money

Let’s say you choose the first in the list above – you don’t talk about your deepest thoughts and feelings. The way to train that particular weakness is pretty simple: start sharing, sister!

I don’t mean you have to find your partner and strap them down for an unload fest of all the things you haven’t told them in years. I mean that little by little, you open up. If something is bothering you, let your partner know how you feel.

It will feel strange and difficult at first. Lots of us are terrified of actually asking for what we want and allowing ourselves to be vulnerable about our emotions.

But pretty soon you’ll notice it’s getting easier and easier. Just like when you first start lifting weights, just squatting a few pounds can feel nearly impossible. And then you get stronger, and you add more weight, and you get stronger, and you add more weight… You get the idea.

So, let’s get started! What weakness are you going to train? Let us know in the comments section below.

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